When I share with you that I'm hurting it's because I need something from you. But what I need is not what you think I need.
You see, I don't need you to fix my problem.
I don't need advice.
I don't need you to tell me you'll pray for me.
I don't need you to recommend a therapist or support group.
I don't need you to give titles of books I should read.
I don't need you to give me a pep talk or remind me that "God is good all the time."
I don't need you to quote Scripture about peace that passes understanding or all things working together for good or God's ways being higher than our ways.
I don't need you to toughen me up by telling me I need to get over it, to put the past behind me, or to pick myself up by the bootstraps.
I simply need you to listen. To hear my heart. To allow me to express my feelings and accept them--whether you would have the same feelings in my situation or not.
It's your listening to me when I'm hurting that will help me to heal. Your listening validates my pain. Your listening reminds me that my feelings matter. What's more, your listening reminds me that I matter.
So will you please just listen?
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